There will most likely be people you know that drive you nuts, but you can’t necessarily get rid of: your parents, in-laws, co-workers, band members, clients, etc. In this situation it’s best to “trim the weeds” instead of cutting them off altogether. Author Napoleon Hill refers to this as “House Cleaning.” Spend as little time with these people. Be polite, but limit yourself to their company. *There may be some cases where you have to “fumigate the premises” instead of house cleaning. I’ve had some toxic people I had no choice but to remove from my life.

Instead of overwhelming yourself with their negativity, just give them a “trim.” I do it with my family members all the time. To be honest, part of the reason why we get along so well is because we don’t spend lots of time together! Give yourself a time limit ahead of time before hanging out with these folks. For example- My mom and I get along, but after about 3 hours, she drives me bananas! I make sure we never really hang out for longer than that. Some people I just “check in” with over the phone- that’s all I need to keep the peace.

“Begin by discarding some of those acquaintances who waste your time, interfere with your efforts and try to manage you. Clear them out! You need not turn them into enemies, but when you want to be yourself you will find ways to avoid any person who tries to deny you the inalienable right of being yourself.”
-Napoleon Hill

Two months ago when my girlfriend, Wendy, was diagnosed with Stage 2 breast cancer, we were in disbelief. “Really?”I asked. Are you sure they didn’t make a mistake? “No,” Wendy replied, sobbing over the phone. “My first initial thought was, What the fuck?! Why would the hospital call her up at work to tell her this unpleasant news? Couldn’t they have told her in person or something, but at work?!! As pissed off as I was about the hospital’s insensitivity (we switched hospitals after that) I realized getting angry and negative would do neither of us any good.

The best options for both of us were to be positive, hopeful, and informed. If we were going to get through this, we’d have to be proactive instead of reactive. We had no problem being positive- I mean, shit- come over to our house and every book on our shelf is about positivity and persistence; but when it came to cancer, we were pretty clueless. And why would we know about cancer? Wendy’s healthy, I’m healthy; cancer is supposed to happen to other people, right?

As Wendy and I began doing some heavy reading and research (me more than Wendy-I’m an info maniac), we discovered a plethora of material regarding lifestyle, diet, and awareness. Now don’t get me wrong, I always knew about bad chemicals and stuff, but when the shit hits home, you really start paying attention to everything! I was blown away with all the chemicals in our foods-especially diet foods, processed foods, skin creams, tooth pastes, and everything else we come into contact with on a daily basis. The real question was: If we put this shit into our system on a daily basis, what will eventually happen? Continuing to dump foods with chemicals into our system every day (you are doing that if you don’t eat organic) will have to equal disaster in the long run. How could it not?

Wendy and I realized from the outside that we appeared to be healthy (we exercised daily and ate low fat), but internally we weren’t. For fuck’s sake, I was eating Lean Pockets and Lean fucking Cuisine every day while Wendy was taking Hydroxy Cut diet pills! Every morning I had my coffee with splenda, and for dessert it was sugar free and fat free jello. On tour, I was a living Red Bull machine.  Yeah, we were thin and had muscle definition, but good lord- what did our insides look like?!

I’m far as hell from being the conspiracy theory dude, but I really began to rethink everything in our lives. For example- Most people (Americans in particular) eat foods with chemicals every day, and then put on chemically loaded creams and antiperspirants that stop you from sweating (sweating is required for the body to release toxins). Add the microwave, cell phones up to our ears all day instead of landlines, and cell phone towers on top of all this and we all have a serious problem.

If Wendy was never diagnosed with cancer, we would still be living the old, unhealthy way. We’ve learned a lot about real health since that life changing day, and have even got my eight year old daughter eating organic as well (she actually likes it). Yes, we have become slightly obsessed with good health (if you’re going to be obsessive, it may as well be health) but we do realize we can’t control everything.

What we do realize is that we can control what we eat and put in our body most of the time. Sometimes it takes something scary and life threatening to turn things around, but to us, the only real scary thing in life is not learning the lesson and improving.
Cancer can kiss my muthf@#king ass.

Click here to purchase a "Heal Cancer" t-shirt to help out! Proceeds will go to Wendy's alternative therapies, medical bills, and a portion of all sales will be donated to the Triple Negative Breast Cancer Foundation.

-Pistol

In every person's life, there is a "bridge" that will take us to the next level of "true life success." The bridge is the only way across into the next phase; the only thing is- there are no guarantees you will make it across this bridge. Personally, I believe everyone can make it across; it's just a matter of believing in yourself.

Average Life=Not really happy and fulfilled, BUT know how things are going to go. You receive a steady paycheck, your job has a title everyone understands, and you know where you will be in 30 years. There is certainty in the average life, but no excitement for living, no passion, and life is on "auto pilot." When you were a child you knew there was more to life than this, but somewhere along the way, you were talked out of it. One day you will wake up and ask yourself, "Is this all there is?"

The Bridge= The transitional stage. There are no guarantees crossing the bridge. You cannot see how long it will take to get to the other side; sometimes you will doubt yourself while crossing and wonder if there is another side! Walking the bridge can be exciting and will bring out all the life lessons you need to be successful- networking, hard work, set-backs, setting goals, endurance, persistence, and forward thinking. While crossing the bridge, you have to take your foot off the "Average Life"; that means letting go of those gigs you don't want anymore, steady income, and other "shackles" attached to comfort.

EX- When I wanted to jump start my music career and transition from "average gigs" to "great gigs," I had to cross the bridge. While I was crossing, I didn't get calls for average gigs anymore (I refused to take them) and was still trying to break into the bigger music world (higher profile, better paying gigs). During this time, I wasn't getting small gigs OR big gigs. I had put myself into uncertainty, but eventually came out on the other side. Crossing the bridge wasn't easy, but was worth it on EVERY LEVEL!

You might have to take a part-time job so you can go back to school. You might have to work in a café while getting your Masters Degree. You might need to teach music lessons while you only pursue gigs that are beneficial to your career, instead of taking meaningless gigs. You might have to move out of Iowa to LA, to pursue acting. You might have to intern for free to get experience. I once met a guy who was working at Subway (the sandwich shop) in Jersey City. He was from India and was studying to become a doctor. Working at Subway and going to school was his bridge to support himself while transitioning to become a high paid doctor.

The Awesome Life= All the hard work, vision, and persistence paying off. You took the risks, saw the future, and worked hard and smart. This is the part where you love your life; you enjoy everyday you wake up. You are on purpose and the whole world knows it when they look, speak, and talk to you. You have wisdom, experience, knowledge, and know anything is possible if you work for it. You appreciate your life and are grateful for all that you have. The money you make is a by-product of your contribution to the world. Yes the money is rad, but you love what you do and would do it for free. You worked hard to get here, so you are thankful to have finally arrived!

You have two choices in Life:

1) Stay where you are, even if you're unhappy, for the rest of your life and continue to get the same things.

2) Cross that bridge and sculpt your life into what you REALLY want. LIVE your life the way you've always dreamed it could be like. GET what you've always wanted. You are going to be here anyway, you may as well TRY!

“The quest for certainty blocks the search for meaning. Uncertainty is the very condition to impel man to unfold his powers.”

-Erich Fromm

CROSS THE BRIDGE!!!!

-Pistol

Recently I had a conversation with a friend regarding what I speak and write about. She told me that there was some truth to what I say, but real life doesn't really work like "fairytale land."  I think she might have misunderstood the message I teach- but I can't blame her. There are a ton of people out there really living in a fantasy world, thinking they can visualize, pray, and wish for things to happen. There is nothing wrong with these things- but without action, they are useless.It's okay being positive, but not delusional. No matter what you want in life, you're going to have to work for it.

I Don't Preach Positivity; I Teach Reality

What I teach is common sense. I teach the power of focus, hard work, discipline, and persistence. These are abilities we all have inside of us- but it's up to us to use them. Life is challenging, but we have the power to deal with it how we want. Nobody enjoys getting cancer, going bankrupt, losing a loved one, or any other thing that hurts, sucks, or doesn't feel good. Sometimes these tough moments can be challenging and aren't meant to be enjoyable (My sister in LA always reminds me: There is no Yin without Yang).

You have 2 choices when it comes to life:

1) Give up when things get hard

2) Keep going and do your best

These two choices are up to us. We have the power to be strong, or the power to throw in the towel. Throwing in the towel is easy because you can blame external events for holding you back.  To keep going and do your best requires effort and hard-work. You have to use your brain and will-power to keep going. And remember: To "keep going" doesn't mean life will get easy.

No matter what you want in life- you must make an effort to get it. Yes, some people have to work harder than others- but so what? You aren't them, and they aren't you! Your path is different and has its own set of obstacles. And if you think nobody has obstacles, you're living in a dreamland.  

Lance Armstrong had obstacles.
Helen Keller had obstacles.
Nelson Mandela had obstacles.
Viktor Frankl had obstacles.
Suzanne Somers had obstacles.
Chris Gardner had obstacles.

The list goes on and on.

Here are some words of advice that can help change your life. They aren't from Jesus, Buddha, the Dalai Lama, or any spiritual teacher. They are words from the highest of the high- Rocky Balboa!

Earlier last month, Wendy and I got some news that wasn't exactly what we wanted to hear going into the new year. To our surprise, Wendy was diagnosed with Stage 2 Breast Cancer. At first we were kind of hesitant about letting anybody know, but then realized this is going to take up a huge part of both our lives, and it would be useless trying to "hide" it.

To be honest, I wasn't really sure if I should post this. I wasn't sure how people were going to react, and Wendy didn't want anybody pitying her. I also didn't want people to think that this was some kind of fucked up way to attract publicity. Who the fuck wants to hear of somebody having cancer? But then Wendy- in her Zen type way- reminded me of how I speak to people about life's ups and downs, and how this would be a good way to let other people who are dealing with a similar situation know that they aren't alone. This would be an opportunity to show others that life's challenges apply to everybody- including us.

  
The first thing that changed upon Wendy's diagnosis was our lifestyle. We were healthy before, but now there's no room to fuck up in terms of health. Goodbye fake sugar products ( sugar-free gum, etc) and chemically altered foods. Hello wheat grass, vegetables, juices, and organic food! Our new rule is: If it ain't natural, we don't touch it! 

Mentally and emotionally, we're 200% positive and only entertain thoughts that serve, instead of thoughts that "scare."  Negativity and negative people don't exist in our lives. In addition to holistic medicine, Wendy is going to Sloan Kettering in NYC, which is one of the best cancer centers in the world, so we're very pleased. Her doctor is awesome and also happens to be co-author of Breast Cancer for Dummies. 

Spiritually we believe everything will work out. Though we aren't "religious," we've always believed in a Univeral Force, God, Energy, or whatever you want to call it. We know things happen for a reason, though we don't always know why. We believe there is a lesson to be learned in all of this. For us, this creates peace of mind.

In terms of medical bills, I'm currently working on an "Cancer Awareness" T-shirt and an Ebook where all the proceeds will go to cover excess medical bills.* We always knew medical bills were expensive, but daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn! I will keep you all posted.

Thanks for all your love and support. If ya wanna send Wednell some positive love (No pity emails!), feel free to email her at: wendy@rockinlifestyle.com 

Sincerely,

Pistol Pete Kaufmann

 

Happy New Year to you all! Here are some ideas you may want to consider in 2010. Don't just wish and hope: follow this advice and watch your life change drastically!


Set Some Big Ass Goals-


Get a journal and write down what you want to accomplish this year.

Pick something that if you accomplished, would have the greatest affect on your life. Don't pick something small that won't make a significant impact.

I set some big ass goals for this year and I'm super excited. I don't believe in thinking small, and never have. When you think small, you get small. If you think big, and don't get what you wanted- you still get more than thinking small! I set a goal in 2009 to earn $100,000. I didn't make my goal, but I did earn a significant amount of money speaking and writing instead of playing drums. I managed to break into a new career and earn a living doing something completely different.

Realize that nothing will change until you change-

The sooner you accept this statement, the faster your life will skyrocket to awesomeness. I had to change some of my own life strategies in the new year. Certain things weren't giving me the results I wanted, so instead of waiting for things to "fall into place," I changed my position. Things were going well, but well isn't what I want out of life; I want f@#king awesome! Take a hard look at 2009. What wasn't working for you? Make sure you put in the effort in 2010.

*If that means moving, consider it.

*If it means getting fit, start.

*If it means taking some classes or lessons, take them.

*If it means read and learn about something, do it!

*If it means quitting, quit!

*If it means ending a bad relationship, end it! Find a new one that will work.

*If it means starting a new band, start!

*If it means auditioning for more movies, audition!

I was very pleased with 2009, but I realized the seriousness of starting a new company as the year unfolded. I realized I had to learn about marketing, advertising, writing, speaking, selling, and honing my business skills. As much as marketing and biz stuff doesn't interest me as much as speaking and playing, it's a part of business that I must accept if I want to see RLS grow. There is no way around this. I am working on these skills in 2010, along with some awesome E-books, a documentary for cable, and a book deal. 2010 will be me busting my ass- but loving every minute of it!

You Have the World at Your Fingertips-

We human beings are very fortunate. We have the ability to alter our destiny by making new choices and taking action on whatever it is we want. We have the ability to glimpse into the future and take the necessary steps to get us there. The only thing that is required of us is to start. Never forget what you are capable of and what is available to you. You possess untapped power that can change the course of the world...if you want to.

“You see things; and you say, 'Why?' But I dream things that never were; and I say, 'Why not?'”

-George Bernard Shaw

Your new life await you!

-Pistol

Action Strategies for Personal Achievement

Tomorrow at midnight it will be 2010. Unlike some,  I will embrace 2010 just as I have embraced all of my 36 years on this planet. At my age, I no longer feel the need to voice my opinion about how quickly time flies-I know it flies. Since graduating high school back in 1992, I've seen Natalie Portman go from being a cute 5 year old to the hottest woman on earth, Marissa Tomei go from 20 something, to being labeled  as a "hot middle-aged woman," and  The Chronic by Dr Dre becoming a classic album (That was 18 years ago).

Luckily for me, I understood the value of using time wisely at a very young age.  I learned  (by default) from being around my dad's two groups of friends. Let me explain:

The first group were a bunch of successful men and women. These people were highly educated, hard-working, and had money out the ass. Most of them had happy families, nice cars, and were super cool and very friendly. All of them came from humble beginnings and worked their way up the ladder of life, like my dad, who was dirt poor as a child.  They were all business when it came to work, but when it was time to play, man, could these people play! 

The second group were the men and women who would frequent The Hunt Club, a local bar located in the Summit Hotel ( It used to be called The Suburban Hotel) which was within walking distance of our house. These men and women were very different from the first group. The majority of these people were down and out and didn't really have any goals in life besides having fun and getting drunk.  Most of them had no direction or interest in getting ahead in life. The only reason my dad would associate with them (besides being an alcoholic himself) was because they were his drinking buddies. The only difference between these folks and my dad was that my dad had a successful company and lots of money.  On the outside he was living large, but on the inside he was just as unhappy as everyone else.


I learned two valuable lessons from both groups of people. From the first group-the successful group- I learned that if you have goals, work hard, and use your time wisely doing something you love, you could have a better life. These people were the living proof. The second group taught me that life moves quick and will leave you behind if you don't use it properly.  If you fuck around long enough, waste your time, and fail to make plans for your future, you'd end up here.  Or even worse, you could end up like my dad: financially wealthy, hardworking, but unhappy (He eventually ended up dying from sorris of the liver back in 1991 before my 17th birthday).

So where am I going with all this?

Let 2010 be the year you work on the things you really want in life. Life is too short to waste. You don't want to wake up one day at age 65, without a pot to piss in, and say to yourself, "What the f@#k happened to my life?!" Or end up working a career you don't enjoy with nothing to look forward to except retirement. Use every moment of 2010 to help propel your future. 

Never forget, a rad life must be crafted and worked on. If you want a happier, healthier and prosperous new year, you're going to have to work on making it a reality. Other wise 2010 will be no different than 2009, or 2008. When the clock strikes midnight, you should be able to look back and tell yourself, "I did my best last year, and will do even better this year!"

 Have a safe and Happy New Year to you all!

Love,

Pistol